There is often a common problem, especially with long term relationships, whereby one partner or both partners tend to progressively lose interest in sex. It’s a bit typical of human nature to grow complacent and lose fervor in the repetitive acts. However, it’s important to fight that vibe and keep things spicy for the sake of your relationship! Every encounter with your partner should be as exciting as a casual sex hookup, and it takes effort from both partners to make that happen!

What Causes Loss of Interest in Sex

There are dozens of reasons for the loss of interest in sex. These include psychological issues like stress and depression. Some biological problems can also lead to disinterest in sex during a relationship. The major cause though is generally monotony. People that are in a relationship tend to do the same thing over and over during sex, and it is bound to get boring. Once it gets boring, you are going to eventually lose interest.

One thing that makes casual sex enjoyable is the thrill that comes with it, and the good thing is you can add that thrill to your long term relationship. All it takes is a little spicing up, and your experience will be a new and exciting adventure every time. Let’s just quickly go through practical ways to spice up and maintain that sexual urge in your relationship:

Making Sex Exciting

The first thing to note is that it is the responsibility of both partners to keep it exciting. Some people tend to think it is solely the other partner who has the role to make the experience unforgettable. But it’s definitely wrong! With this in mind, we can easily go through some things you can do to make sure that your sex is still exciting and desirable.

Talk about Your Sexual Fantasies

The main reason why most fantasies are never fulfilled is that people tend to keep them to themselves. Discussing your fantasies with your partner will help to make your sex exciting as they will have the actual idea of what you like in the bedroom. Talking about your fantasies helps your partner to mold their behavior during sex towards your fantasies, and we can assure you that you will enjoy it.

The main reason why your partner might be losing interest might be the sex does not include the things they fantasize about, but with their fantasies thrown into play, they will not just be interested in sex, they will love it. The best way to discover fantasies is watching porn together. Try to pick your favorite porn and watch it together to get the basic idea of what your partner fantasizes about.

Schedule Some Personal Time

With work and a dozen other commitments, you might fail to find time to make love, and when you have time, you might be too tired for this. Scheduling personal time when you can hump away like rabbits allows you to prepare and look forward to your sexual encounter. As you bide your time towards the ‘sex-date’, get things moving by simple acts like sexting or even sharing some sensual pictures just to build up interest.

Try Different Positions

The Kama Sutra has dozens of positions that you need to try with your partner. Sex is bound to become less interesting if you are always using the same position every time you have it, be open to experiments, hit it from the back, try to practice standing position in the shower. The good thing with the digital age is you do not even need to be creative, the internet does it for you. Just google and try to find some new positions that you and your partner will be comfortable with and give them a go.

Ditch Pajamas!

Pajamas and oversize college sweaters are rarely sexy, so try to substitute them with some sexy attire when you go to bed, some lingerie for the women, and tight boxers for the males. The dressing has that special touch that makes the whole experience a lot better, and I’m sure, you know that sex is mental hence the sex is bound to be more passionate if you choose the right outfit.

Do Not Just Keep It in Bedroom

Getting edgy can make the process a whole lot interesting, especially by constantly changing the environment in which you make love. Imagine sex on the kitchen counter before breakfast, or in your car, well, do not just imagine, do it. Have sex in places you have not had tried before and allow that thrill to continuously spark your sexual attraction. Strictly keeping sex to the bedroom can make the entire experience a little dull.

Do Not Ignore Nonsexual Acts that Make Sex Interesting

Foreplay is very important. Foreplay sets the precedence for the whole sex session, and it is very important, especially when it comes to the female orgasm. People tend to ignore the foreplay and just jump into the penetrative sex. You should find your partners most sexually sensitive parts and work on them. Touch them, and if you can, suck them to heighten the sexual pleasure.

Get Kinky

If you are conservative when it comes to sex, getting kinky might just be the answer to reigniting your sex life. There are dozens of kinky things you can try to electrify your relationship’s sex flame.


The idea of bondage and dominance turns most people on. You and your partner can start with the small stuff if you are skeptical of the whole BDSM experience. Start with spanking and blindfolding, progressively grow to your limits. To make sure BDSM is exciting, try to switch positions regularly. BDSM brings miracles when it comes to reigniting sexual desires. There is a lot of information on the internet on the subject, so be sure to look it up and enjoy it.

Introduce Sex Toys

Sex toys are an essential part of a mind-blowing session. There are dozens of sex toys types, and there is bound to be one each of you will like. Try to shop for sex toys together. There are dozens of categories, but for those that are just starting, a fleshlight and a dildo might be the perfect starting points, and you can eventually move on to other complex tools.

Introduce Third Partner

Depending on how liberal your relationship is, introducing a third person to your sex sessions can bridge your sexual desires. If that is what you fantasize about, let your partner know, and if you agree to go on with it, it is easy to find one on online dating sites. There are categories like couples seeking a man or couple seeking a woman where you can get that person to have that perfect threesome.


Ready to bring back the spark to your bedroom? Spicing up is the best way to try and reignite sexual interest, but if all this fails, you can try talking to a professional therapist to try and piece your sex life back to normal. Don’t have someone special to try it all? Visit the Wickedlist online dating website today and find the perfect match for your interests wherever you are in the US! Good luck!