Dating is amazing, and everyone has the right to enjoy it. Thankfully, the world has become very tolerant. People are getting equal opportunities, regardless of gender, race, or physical capabilities. The fact that someone has a disability does not discount the fact that they might be your perfect date. There are some aspects that you have to take into consideration when you are dating someone with a disability. These few aspects will make sure that the dating experience is both exciting and convenient for both you and your partner. First, we have to make sure that we draw the parameters and explain what disabilities are before discussing some of the things you need to consider.
What is Disability?
According to ADA, a disabled person is described as someone with a condition of the body that impairs their ability to perform certain activities (Activity Impairment), interact, and fully participate in the environment around them, which is also described as participation restriction. The definition of disability is broad. Most people tend to neglect some of the other conditions that are encompassed in the umbrella term that is a disability. Disability does not have to do with physical health only.
Some forms of disability include vision, hearing, movement, and social relationships. Communicating, mental health and thinking are also some forms that disability can take. Causes of disabilities differ. In some instances, certain individuals are disabled due to genetics, or the disability might be a result of an accident.
Tips on Dating Someone with Disability
If you are dating someone with a disability, or if you are planning to, these are some of the things you must consider before getting into a relationship. Whether it’s a long-term relationship, or you are just dating casually, these tips will make your relationship smooth.
Understand that Disability does Not Signal Inability, Especially in Dating
This statement has somewhat become cliché, but it is essential to realize it. Giving disabled people extra treatment will not do them any good but make them feel somewhat inadequate. In terms of dating, whether it is casual dating or a long-term relationship, you are equal partners, and giving your partner unneeded special attention will make them feel like they are a burden rather than a dating partner. That might ruin the entire idea of the relationship. Ask them first, and if they can do something without assistance, let them do it.
Be Willing to Learn Both on Dating and Disability
The biggest problem that disabled people face is that most people do not know a lot about disabilities, and they’re also not that keen to improve their knowledge in that area. If you are dating someone with a disability, you need to be willing to find out and understand not only their health issue but disability as a whole. Getting all the knowledge on disability will help you know your partner’s boundaries and limitations. This way, you will know when they need help. Asking for help is not the easiest thing to do, and you will do a huge favor for your partner if you will know beforehand when your partner needs help.
If you can, it might also be a good idea to join the community and support the rights of people with disabilities. It will go a long way in strengthening your relationship. Besides, you can do it in the comfort of your home. You can sign petitions, join online webinars on disability to help share the public conversation on disability.
Plan Amazing Dates
Everyone deserves an amazing date. You have to be able to keep a balance between the date being exciting and also make sure that it is safe and fun for your partner. Disabled people love adventurous dates too. Do not limit them when they want to experience something new. You can always make reservations for you and your partner to get tailored packages for these adventurous dates. Take your partner out to live shows; make sure they experience those amazing movies. The best part nowadays is that cinemas and restaurants have ramps if your partner uses a wheelchair. And if your partner might need some special treatment, you can make arrangements. Make sure that your partner’s disability does not overshadow the positive aspects of your relationship. Do not make your date cliché.
Do Not Neglect Intimacy
It is one of the main aspects that people in relationships might miss. Intimacy is essential in any relationship. If you are dating a disabled person, you do not have to abandon the sex part of your relationship. Most people with a disability can satisfy their partners in bed. In the few instances that the disability does not allow having sex, you can always find alternative methods like oral sex to satisfy both you and your partner.
There is a need to explore intimacy: you might be comfortable with certain sex routines, but sticking to them might end up making intimacy boring. Find amazing sex positions to try with your partner. Yes, your disabled partner might have limits, but trying something new and safe for them will give your intimacy the edge it deserves.
Communication Is Key
It is very important, especially in the early stages of your relationships. There are certain grey areas that your conversations should not cross. Certain questions and assertions can make your partner feel uncomfortable. Try to avoid asking questions like how they got the disability. Questions like “do you get sick a lot?” should be avoided at all costs. They are awkward and will make your partner feel out of place. In the early days of the relationship, keep your questions casual and, most importantly, appropriate.
Online dating is one place that allows diversity to thrive. Online dating sites like Wickedlist allow people with disabilities to thrive and blossom on the dating scene. Like Backpage and Craigslist, these online dating sites open up a whole new world of dating – a world of personal classifieds. If you fancy getting yourself a date for a long term relationship or just some steamy casual sex, head over to Wickedlist and sign up for free now!
My wife is blind, and we have a strong bond and a happy marriage, mainly because I’ve never made her feel like she’s disabled. We have a little son who is healthy and beautiful. The nanny helps us take care of him, but I believe every US family has a nanny if they could afford to hire them.
Once I dated a girl who had cancer. She died when I was with her. Terrible feelings… And I spent her last half a year with her when she was almost helpless. But we talked a lot, and thanks to her, now I appreciate my life, live it to the fullest, love people around me, my family, friends. She’s always in my heart as she taught me a lot during that hard time.