How do you expect someone to love and appreciate you if you do not love or appreciate yourself? Self-love is quite an essential aspect when it comes to any relationship. It is so easy for you to fall in love when you are in a good relationship with yourself. This is why you will find lots of psychologists encourage their clients to go through the phase of self-appreciation before they think of tagging someone in their life’s journey.

What Do We Call Self-Love?

The process of finding oneself entails examining your life’s peaks and valleys and accepting them as a vital part of your development. Being willing to independently reflect in your life without being coerced to do so means being at ease spending time with your inner self. The process has to be free of shame and judgment, to work on yourself and your vulnerabilities, strengths, shortcomings, and valuable contributions to yourself and people around you. Read more from our guide on how to deal with insecurities to find out more on how you can kickstart on your journey to self-love.

When we are overly critical of ourselves, we are usually motivated by a desire to succeed and doing everything perfectly all of the time. It requires a great deal of self-criticism, and perfectionism is defined by that persecutory inner voice that always reminds us how we should have done things better. Some of us work excessively hard and are continuously attempting to better oneself and get a grip on the structured illusion of perfection. On the other hand, all this may require lots of self-care and compassion.

You might be asking yourself what it has to do with any relationships. You will be more confident and self-assured in your love for others if you can actually find pleasure and love in yourself. Only by being good to ourselves, we can be kind to others. At the end of the day, you can make use of thank-you notes, certificates of recognition, cards you’ve gotten, and other artifacts that remind you of your victories. These will help you realize your achievements.

Importance of Self-Love in Building Healthy Relationship

At some point, you will get older and tired of casual dating. It means that you will start reevaluating your life and try to move on from the different toxic relationships that you have been exposed to. Here is how self-love can help in molding your long-term relationships.

Your Partner Will Treat You the Way You Treat Yourself

After reading this article, you are going to bid adieu to insecurity, jealousy, and neediness. You’ll come across as a strong, confident, and secure person in relationships if you love yourself. You are going to start feeling complete, and you won’t require external affirmation any longer.

From now on, your relationships should be based on fulfillment rather than emptiness. Therefore, you must be able to communicate effectively with your spouse/partner because you’ll be aware of your own desires. You’ll realize the different effects of the boundaries that you can get to set. When you embrace self-love, you’ll come across as a powerful individual.

love yourself and build a healthy relationship

Like Poles Attract

In order for you to attract the best, you will need to make sure that you are the best version of yourself. The moment that you start truly loving yourself, your energy shifts, and you are going to start attracting better lasting partners: people who deserve your devotion. If you have a low self-esteem, you will attract people who have the same low self-esteem and the propensity to use and manipulate you.

On the other hand, If you have a strong feeling of self-love, you will attract partners who share your values. Understand that you must be the person you wish to attract. Therefore, our long-term relationship advice is that if you really want better, you must be stronger.

Stop Depending on Your Partners

The moment that you start having a high regard for yourself, codependency is nearly impossible. You are capable of standing on your own two feet and are powerful enough to do it. The quality of a partnership becomes fragile and riddled with mistrust when parties lack self-love. You become obsessed on relying on your spouse/partner to alleviate your insecurities and reassure you in order to get your wants met. You will find better ways on how to deal with your partner’s bff who is being a nuisance to your relationship when you are more calm and collected.

Do Not Let Anyone Define You

You are the only one who knows you. From the type of food that you like, the clothes you are comfortable in, and so many more. You’ll be better able to talk with your partner about how they can contribute to your happiness if you practice making yourself happy. When you place undue pressure on people to take care of your needs and fears, you’re being unfair. As a result, the relationship will suffer.

On the other hand, becoming a dream girl, spouse, or whoever you want to be, can change the way you think of your own desires and needs. You probably wind up sacrificing too much if you get too wrapped up in another person. What is the solution? From the start, be yourself and love yourself. Recognize your virtue and don’t be afraid to flaunt it.

Your Happy Ending Begins with You

It is possible to live happily ever after, but it must begin with you. Remember, you are the one who is in charge of your life. No one can write your story, except you. It all starts with wanting the best for you. When you feed your self-love, the kind of people you attract, the quality of your interactions, and what you offer to the relationship – all improve the chances of long-term success for both parties. You’ll know how much you’re worth.

You’ll know how you want to be treated and won’t accept anything less than what you deserve. Whether you are a woman seeking a man or a man seeking a woman, you have to set the standard what route you’d like your love life to follow and what you require in your relationship. All this can be done by showing yourself love. Simply said, your significant other will treat you with respect, love, forgiveness, and compassion if you show yourself these qualities as well.

Do Not Take Self-Love Overboard

Narcissistic personality disorder is an extreme form of unhealthy self-love (NPD). Research done shows that men are the ones who mainly suffer from this condition. Men are likely to be labeled narcissistic than women, although it isn’t always the case. The overwhelming obsession with power, prestige, and vanity characterizes narcissism. Narcissistic guys are incapable of seeing the harm they are doing to themselves and people around them.


As humans, it is normal for us to feel left behind and pressured to succeed in life. It can lead you to resenting yourself and different achievements you have gained. But, eventually, you will find that you have actually done a great job. All you will have to do now is wait for your time to come, and you can start yielding your results. Wickedlist is not only there to help you find love from others, we are also eager to make sure that you get to love and appreciate yourself.